Natasha Stasiuk's journey to self-discovery and golf greatness
After years of undiagnosed autism, Natasha finally hits her stride
You’re getting a little break today from propaganda for my new Getting Unstuck book, although I can’t resist telling you the reviews have been very nice. Check out John Gordon’s review below.
If you’re a member of a club or a club professional, I’m delivering workshops through the winter based on the book. With all the banter, Q&A and group dynamics, I guarantee you’ll come away with something valuable for your game. To discuss, send an email to tim@oconnorgolf.ca.
This article was especially important to me because I have known Natasha and her parents for about 10 years. I began coaching mental game and life coaching with Natasha when she was 16 as a junior and as a U.S. college player.
As part of a season-long project with ClubLink, I was honoured to write this profile of Natasha Stasiuk which is a story of resilience, tenacity, support and love.
Hitting a golf ball shouldn’t be that difficult. The ball just sits there mute and motionless, waiting for you to hit it. But every golfer will tell you that golf often feels impossible.
But imagine trying to play competitive golf feeling like you have zero control of your emotions.
Imagine if you couldn’t understand what your fellow players or officials were saying to you, or you couldn’t remember your score on a hole.
That’s what golf has historically been like for Natasha Stasiuk.
Despite her obvious talent for golf and love for the game, Natasha and her parents worried if the culture of golf could accommodate her.
Today, at age 26, the world is very different for Natasha, who learned only three years ago that she is on the autism spectrum.
Natasha is also the No. 1 ranked female golfer in the world with an intellectual disability.
“It’s amazing what she’s accomplished,” said Ralph Bauer, who coaches PGA Tour players and Natasha. “She’s hall of fame material. I’m surprised more people haven’t heard of her.”
Natasha has won the Canadian All Abilities Women’s Golf Championship every year since it began in 2021. Since the first Golf Ontario Adaptive Championship in 2019, she’s the only champion.
For last two years, she’s won USGA Adaptive Open Women’s Championship for Intellectual Impairment. In 2023, she finished third in the Special Olympics World Games in Berlin despite suffering a broken ankle three months earlier.
She’s also the current club champion at RattleSnake Point Golf Club, and three-time club champion at Heron Point Golf Links. Her index hovers around five.
Ever humble, the closest Natasha comes to summing up her recent success is to offer “it’s nice that people look up to me.”
Since the launch of regional and national All Abilities golf events and Special Olympics programs for golf within the last six years, Natasha now feels comfortable and part of a community.
“She can’t believe what’s happened for her,” her mother Sandra said. “She’s lucky to have come along when competitive golf for people with disabilities came along.”
For Natasha and her parents, the last six years stand in stark contrast to many years of frustration, mainly because they didn’t know what caused Natasha’s emotions to sometimes be volatile, and why she struggled socially and intellectually.
Natasha was born in Russia. Her birth mother left her at a poorly run hospital at six months of age. She had pneumonia.
Sandra and her husband Peter adopted Natasha at 13 months. Natasha didn’t make sounds or talk like children her age, which her parents assumed was because she heard a different language as an infant. By giving Natasha lots of love and support, they hoped she’d catch up and flourish.
In pre-school, Natasha couldn’t do basic arithmetic and many other things her peers were doing. Her parents enrolled her in a private school with hopes the extra attention would help, but she was always behind.
“Homework was so difficult for Natasha,” Sandra said. “She’d be screaming, hysterical.”
Sandra and Peter were encouraged, however, that Natasha was nimble and had excellent hand-eye coordination. They enrolled her in gymnastics, ballet, hockey, and other sports and she excelled.
When she was in Grade 2, PGA of Canada professional Nick Starchuk invited Natasha to Glen Abbey Golf Club. “He gave her a 30-foot putt and said, ‘How close can you get it?’” Peter said.
“She made it. We hadn’t thought of golf for Natasha. That was the genesis.”
Natasha began taking lessons with professional Carrie Vaughan at Glen Abbey who worked with a team of elite girls. Natasha flourished as part of a team and her swing gradually improved. At 16, she won the team’s most improved player award.
With her emerging skills, Natasha developed more confidence and began to see herself as a golfer. She also found inspiration from LPGA Tour stars such as Paula Creamer who became an idol and role model.
Even though Natasha’s physical skills were developing, tournaments could be emotional minefields. Most junior tours prevent players from having a caddie. Natasha often couldn’t remember key Rules of Golf, and she often couldn’t process what her playing partners were saying to her, which confused them and made her upset.
“Looking at Natasha, you wouldn’t think she has a disability, but she does,” said Peter, who caddies for Natasha in events such as the All Abilities tournaments.
She often felt judged by other teenage girls. They sometimes tricked her, saying she scored higher than she did, and they shot lower than they did. Upset and confused, she finished last in a few tournaments and left the course in tears.
Despite her struggles, Sandra and Peter saw golf as a portal for Natasha. They paid for lessons and encouraged her; Peter drove her all-over Southern Ontario and helped her communicate.
At 19, she won a bronze medal in a tournament. “This was her first (top three) and it gave Natasha a lot of confidence,” Sandra said.
While Natasha kept playing in tournaments, she continued to have emotional breakdowns and she rarely played to her standards. “She was still competing in mainstream events such as the Ontario Amateur, and not feeling a part of it all,” said Ann Carroll, who later became Natasha’s coach. “But I think when she was introduced to Special Olympics, she found her people.”
Natasha entered the first ever Golf Ontario Adaptive Championship in 2019 and won it. She was invited in 2021 to participate in the Special Olympics golf program at Hamilton Golf & Country Club, which provides the participants—at no cost—with access to its practice facilities, nine-hole course and lessons with Ralph Bauer who coaches the group every Monday evening.
“It’s been a great experience for Natasha,” said Mike Lamontagne, former CEO of Special Olympics Canada. “She’s a sweet person, she cares, she’s genuine, she loves the game and to compete.”
“Holy smokes, what a gifted golfer,” Bauer exclaims. “I have three guys in the top 50 in the world, and I’d rather watch her than them. Every time she comes to a lesson, I’m shocked by how good she hits it.”
Even with her success on the golf course, Natasha’s impairment remained a mystery, which made it difficult to help her and to choose appropriate opportunities in other parts of her life.
When she was 22, Natasha saw a psychologist and underwent testing. A year later, the results came back—Natasha was on the autism spectrum. “This was a huge relief because Natasha could now understand herself better,” Sandra said.
“It helped make a lot of things clearer. We never understood her emotions. Now we have a more complete picture of Natasha emotionally, and she can get therapy for handling those emotions.”
Natasha said: “Other people can’t see it. I had a feeling I had it. It doesn’t bother me.”
Natasha is finishing a course in the Developmental Services Worker program at Humber College in Toronto. She wants to pursue a career in policing to help officers better understand people with mental challenges.
“I think she’s very comfortable where she’s at,” Bauer said. “She’s always focused on what she can give back to society.”
Natasha and her parents are also grateful for people like Bauer and Lamontagne who have championed programs and events that allow athletes like Natasha to pursue their passions, compete, and experience all the gifts that golf and sports provide for discovery, self-expression, and fun.
“Whatever crap I’m going through, I can just play golf,” Natasha said. “Golf is my happy place.”
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Some reviews must be shared publicly. This review of Getting Unstuck on my Amazon page is from—admittedly—my friend John Gordon, who was my editor at SCOREGolf magazine a thousand years ago, and a great writer and editor.
Here’s my succinct review of Tim O’Connor’s Getting Unstuck: 7 Transformational Practices for Golf Nerds: Buy it. Whether you’re an experienced golfer or just taking up the game, buy it. It costs less than a sleeve of golf balls and not only will it last longer, it will help you enjoy the game more.
Here’s the much longer version.
A couple of disclaimers in the interests of full transparency: First, I’ve known Tim as a friend and golf-writing colleague for about 40 years. (There’s a totally unnecessary mention of me in the book’s acknowledgements.) Second, I’m the farthest thing from a golf “nerd” or, indeed, anyone who has the slightest interest in being “transformed” in any way, shape or form. I abhor any book, podcast or other medium that presents the game (or sport, depending on your approach) of golf as some sort of mystical religion, especially if it’s communicated by some fictional dweeb called something like “Sandy McDivot.” It’s been said that the smaller the ball, the more there is written about it. While that is true, much of it is crap.
Not this book.
So, if you’ve gotten this far, understand that you don’t have to be a golf nerd or some navel-gazing transcendalist to get serious and lasting value out of this book. Tim has distilled a lifetime of playing the game, writing about the game, coaching the game and agonizing over the game into an eminently readable 145 pages. The book is conversational and, in fact, could be the written version of the excellent podcast he co-hosts with “Humble” Howard Glassman.
As I said, this is a distillation of Tim’s immersive life in golf and he doesn’t shrink from putting his own foibles and shortcomings on display, many of which most golfers can relate to: temper tantrums, unrealistic expectations, poor sportsmanship, just being a jerk. He uses these personal anecdotes to illustrate the universal impact golf has on just about everyone who has played the game. But then (ta-da!), he tells us how to do better, to be better, and stay better.
Beginners will, and should, devour every word and re-read the book regularly. I wish it had been around when I took up the game. Instead, like most longtime duffers, I learned some of what Tim espouses through a lifetime of shanks, whiffs and foozles. But what I didn’t learn, for the most part, was how to heal myself.
(The sub- subtitle of this awkwardly named book is “How to change your self-defeating behaviours and move your game forward.”)
Many snippets, passages and so-called “Interludes” in the book have proved valuable. I am Exhibit A that even an aged curmudgeon can implement Tim’s sensible advice on meditation, visualization, mental attitude, awareness and gratitude.
I can’t say I like the title of this book all that much but everything between the covers is terrific.
(Tim knew I had to throw that last sentence in.)
Thx John. I really appreciate your kind and thoughtful review, and I'm not surprised that the review itself reveals that you sir a great writer.
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If you’re interested in golf coaching or workshops for your club or organization, please send an email to tim@oconnorgolf.ca. I invite you to check out www.oconnorgolf.ca.
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